bored.

i'm bored, does anyone actually read this? i bet not.
i'm just sitting at home trying to do anything but work.
if anyone reads this then, when you see me, say to me, 'mushroom' and i will shake your hand.

I've changed

i saw something videos on the web, generally athiestic and i've discovered that i really do find it painful to watch and hear people blaspheme. my mind just can't take it. it feels like torture. i just can't watch. i mention this because i used to think that i thought.. yeah whatever, it doesn't bother me, they're just words, people can think what they want... but now i've found out...it does bother me. in a rather deep and painful way. i think it's ok if people ask a question in a rhetorical way, as long as they expect an answer. but these people were saying what they were saying as if it were the final ultimate truth and that for me really cut through me. i couldn't bear to hear people talk like that and say such things. i can't even say those things now in reference because it reminds me of the videos and it hurts quite a bit. i think i perhaps have changed in may ways in the last few years but until something demonstrates that change, i don't see it.